The Baardskeerder - AfrikaBurn's Newsletter - View web version

 (Soon, this is the skyline you'll be gazing upon - shot by Jonx Pillemer)

Got your glitter and glowsticks? Got your Native American feather headdress and your bootload of booze? Schweet, cuz - you're all set to hit the jol! But it doesn't sound like you're preparing for AfrikaBurn, so you may want to consider selling your ticket - and you'd best make sharp, because god knows you're going to need the cash money for the EDM fest you seem to be preparing for. However, if you've got a pile of survival gear taking over your life and you're focused on stuff like rebar and water consumption and how to distribute a load best in your vehicle, then you're on track for a wild rumpus. Not long now...

The Clan burns in 15 days.

In this newsletter:



There's not much to tell you here that you don't already know - the only tickets available are now via STEP or direct sales, and you'd know how to get those because we've been banging on about them for months, right? Hundreds - let's move on to the important other stuff:

- as always, you need your ticket and photo ID when you arrive at the event gate.
- if you don't have an Early Access Pass, please arrive on or after Monday April 24th.
- STEP closes this coming Monday, 17th of April, and by midday on Friday the 21st, all unsold tickets will be back in the accounts of their owners, which gives people to sell their tickets directly.
- if you have a ticket you want to buy or sell directly, you're able to do that right up until the event ends.

If you're on a crew and have EA Passes, great - just remember that if you're giving anyone a lift and arriving before the 24th, they'd also need an EA Pass (or else you'll have to leave them at the roadside at Die Hek, which would be kak).


It's a reality that as things get larger, so they have to get more organised - and this is the case with projects that are taking delivery of materials and infrastructure for artworks, camps and so on. This year, we have a Supplier Depot - and if you expect a delivery, this is where you would need to meet the vehicle and escort it to your camp location.
Find out more here on this post about supplier guidelines.



Weather happens. Rebar shin damage, that happens. Dehydration happens, and garotting by unlit guy ropes, yep, that happens too, unfortunately. As does sunburn, punctured sidewalls, whiteouts and flooding. Don't forget: the disclaimer on your ticket does after all clearly state: 'You assume the risk of serious injury or death by attending this event'.

What to do? Stay alive, by reading all the necessary info - and you can find it all in this year's (glorious, beautiful and very informative) Survival Guide and WTF Guide. Here they are as PDF's (you can pick up printed copies at the gate on arrival):

Survival Guide 2017
- WTF Guide & Map 2017

And lastly, in case something does happen to you in the dust, don't forget we have a Voluntary Medical Info form that you can fill out so that should our medics or community care crews need to, they can quickly know who you are and whether you have any existing medical conditions, and treat you appropriately. Fill the form out here.

It may be a small city you're headed to, but it's a very remote settlement, so plan ahead, and be ready for anything.

                                                                                                                                       (Hippies use side entrance - thanks to Jonx for this shot of the Arteria Booth)


No, not latte art - for godsakes, this ain't no artisan hipster caffeine fest. Nope: it's late art we're talking about, as in "Fok - I made A Thing, but I didn't register it, so what now?". Here's what: no problem, and no it doesn't cost fokol either. Anyone's welcome to bring their unregistered artworks or performance to the desert, of course - after all, we welcome the stranger, even if they're slapgat and missed the deadline for inclusion in this year's WTF Guide.

If you've got a piece, or a performance, all you need to do once you arrive is head over to Arteria at Off-Centre Camp and speak to our charming Art Assist volunteers, who'll help you get placement or advise you on when & where may be best for the thing you want to do.  



As a self-organised community, we dislike rules - but there's something that we dislike even more: arson and litter. Which is why there are some items that are positively abolutely not welcome in Tankwa Town - and those are fireworks, flares, fire lanterns and feathers. If you know someone creating a gorgeous costume that consists of feathers, be a friend and let them know those feathers are a complete bitch to pick up. While you're at it, if you know someone who's still under the impression that wearing Native American war bonnets is a great idea, you may want to have a word about cultural appropriation. And feathers.

If you know a friend who's looking to set off a clutch of fire lanterns in memory of Fluffy their dearly departed Maltese poodle, let them know that those things have burned tents in our city before - and have caused wildlife to become snagged in their wires - and are thus a truly kak idea. And if you know some bright spark who thinks that setting off a flare is, like, just so amazeballs, you should tell them to get a clue and leave that shit at home.

Please help us prevent unplanned burns, dangers to wildlife and cheap-ass feathers blowing in the wind (and being chased by volunteers on our Leave No Trace team) - have a word with anyone you know who might think these items are a good idea.

                                                                                                                     (Here's Molly the Mollusc last year in the dust lit up as all hell, as shot by Gita Claassen)


Staying with the theme of survival tips, here's a threat to your personal safety in the dust: darkness. It's true to say that  injuries happen when bikes and Mutant Vehicles collide into people, or vice versa, on account of low or poor light. Our DMV has specifically requested that we blast all and sundry with a call to light yourself up, so that you, your mutant, bike or camp are visible and thus safe from collisions or accidents.

So, as the days count down, keep an eye out for the best options for personal or mobile lighting - and use your noodle: don't choose one-use, disposable lights like glowsticks or cheap fairy lights. They're crap and inevitably end up being thrown away into a landfill, and ain't no planet got time for that. Choose solar first, and if you can find it, select durable and rugged lighting options that will stand up to the test of the Tankwa and be there for you in future.


                                                                                                                                                                       (Dust, anybody? Thanks to Jonx for this shot from 2013) 


Want to find out just how many invisible roles & tasks happen to make our city rise, rock and run? Got some time and an inkling to pitch in and help out? There's a page that can answer all of those questions and more: click this and prepare to be boggled by the long list of Stuff That Gets Done By Volunteers.



In a space where radical self expression is encouraged, it's inevitable that some people would want to push the envelope out there - and this means that some folks are going to be nekkid, semi-nude or undressed to impress. This is why we suggest parents read up about the dynamics of parenting at the burn - and it's also why any accredited media representatives are provided with some guidelines as far as capturing images of people goes.

To make sure you and others are comfortable expressing in ways of your choosing, there's another device which we introduced last year: the pink NO PHOTO NO VIDEO armband, which was inspired by the example of our cousins over the sea at Burning Seed in Oztralia. If you're looking to express yourself, and you'd like to send a visual signal to anyone with a camera, head over to Off-Centre Camp at the event and pick one (or more) up for free, gratis and mahala.


We're almost out the door and on the road, so round about now there's just enough time to remind you again to bring an FM radio to the dust, so that you can listen to the dulcet tones of... well, let's be honest, they're not all that dulcet after dust and smoke and all the rest, but they are on air and 'they' are Radio Free Tankwa. You'll find them on site in their caravan at Off-Centre Camp - and if you're in a theme camp or on a sound crew, they've got a special gift for you: small, sturdy FM radios that have an aux out option, so you can plug in and broadcast to your area.

To get a radio for your camp or rig, pop over to the RFT studio when you get on site - but before then, if you've got a project and would like to get word out about it, don't forget that RFT are still accepting Public Service
Announcements. If you've got a voice and can drive a phone, you can record a PSA. Once you've done so, send it in to (and try to keep it to less than or around 45 secs).

Wanna listen right now and get a taste of the madly eclectic (and completely ad-free) mix that RFT broadcasts? Hit this.

Something to listen to for the drive?

It's true - the RFT crew have recorded a session designed to prepare you for your re-entry into Tankwa Town. Download it, or burn it to an antiquated Compact Disc if that's how your media rolls, and listen to it on that long road. GET IT HERE.




Love the sound of a potjie whisper? Believe that cooking in cast iron is good for the soul? Then this is for you! Dust off your potjie and come cook a pot or three with some of the rustiest desert-chefs this side of the R355. Hell, you might just win AfrikaBurn! This is open to anyone and everyone who loves a bit of epic fire-food.

Bring your own fireplace (a wheel drum works a treat), your pot full of deliciousness, wood or charcoal to keep her going, and enough 'gees' to light up the Clan. Judging will be wildly erratic, bribery is encouraged and a little dust only adds to the flavour. One rule: no bowl = no chow.

Where: 2:45ish on the Binnekring
When: Thurs noon 'til sunset
Event page is here  
                                                                                                                        (thanks to Jan Verboom of this shot of the rare greater spotted tankwa leopard posse)

Leopards unite! Join the pride at Camp NOW for a wild and spotted leopard dance party - and once you've gathered, get on the prowl for a parade that kics off at 2pm. Location? 10ish and Happy - look for the spots. If you've joined them before you'll know it's an addiction that sets your inner beast free, so invite your friends and get involved, you filthy animals!

Event page?
Head this way.  

Just before sunset on the Friday of the burn, the Kneidel Meidels camp are hosting a welcoming of the Sabbath - Kabbalat Shabbat - ceremony followed by a vegetarian dinner before the Clan burns - and they're inviting all & sundry (yes, even you) - bring your own cutlery. Please let us them know if you'll be there so they can plan around the numbers for feeding: mail 

Event page?
Get it here.

LIn a desert far, far away grown-ups go to play - but this year, the Pukka Theatre collective is making theatre go wild with the ultimate players: kids! Their gift will be to facilitate primary school-aged burners in 'real' theatre-making.

INCUBATING: For the curious & broody, 'Mi nesta su Nesta' - come & make off-stage magic in the workshop at Burning Mail (4ish on Binnekring) on Thurs, Fri & sat from 10am - 5pm. The crew will be able to work with 12 kids max at a time, so reach out to them in advance if you'd like to book a specific slots. Mail

PERFORMANCE: Be on standby Saturday at sunset to watch things come alive & go wild at the Plays Gone Wild stage.


Got a Mutant Vehicle? Is it small enough to play polo at 10km/h? Fancy whacking a ball around the dust and laughing your ass off? Well hell, there's worse things that you could do than join the 3rd Annual Mutant Polo tournament!

Where: gather at the Clan
When: Thursday 27th April
What: balls and mutated vehicles


Oh come, all ye faithful - and wear your purplest purple as you gather to be wed in unholy matrimony (or patrimony, we're an equal-opportunity community) by His Holeness Bishop Loon, the Friar of Funk! Wed your friend, wed your partner or even wed your favourite pair of desert boots, but whatever you do, come as purple as you can.

Where: Pompeii, 2ish & Binnekring
When: Saturday April 29th, 2-4pm
What: A very loony affair

Event page (and free tickets) here



- uSpoek Mathambo's new album
- Sori Kondie's 'The Freetown Tapes'
- Cinematic Orchestra 'Every Day'
- Warrick Sony's 'The Dope Years Vol 1_Sides A & B'
- Felix Laband 'Donkey Rattle / Kill The Boer'

No word of a lie, it's true.

Travis Lyle

Minister of Don't Leave The Fucking WTF Guides In The Rain!

Wow, you've got time to read all the way down to here? Impressive, you must be well organised. Seeing as you've got some time on your hands, why not read this sweet little ditty from Anon about money, and decommodification - and how magic happens when you think beyond consumer society.


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